Friday, April 29, 2005


Well, as I said, I was going to go back to Maya's suggestions on the Yourself!Fitness program. No more over riding what she wants me to do and do what I want to do.

I did a 30 minute core focus today. I was as frustrated as I was in the beginning. I can't do soooo many of the exercises: anything that requires to hold myself up, for example. She had me do all sorts of planks. I can't hold up my body that long. Even if I decrease the difficulty, she expects too much from me. However, I did what I could. I ended poses early, or I did a plank instead of the one legged planke (oh, and how am I not supposed to feel it in my shoulders? Maya needs bigger boobs so she understands what it's like to hold up an extra 5lbs on her chest on some of these...)

Anyway, I do feel like it's a good idea to get back into her schedule. I need to push myself... reach for some new goals. Not just a dress size or weight on the scale, but being able to do one legged planks.

I still need to add a little extra cardio to my workouts. I think I'll keep with the 30 minute of Maya focus, then add an extra half hour of an other cardio (like I did back in the beginning). Treadmill, bike or Maya for some more cardio should really help me get back on a weight loss track again

Today's Positive Comment:
I pushed myself to focus on a workout that I'm not overly fond of doing.

Monday, April 25, 2005


I've been in and out of focus the last week on my workouts. It's an easy pattern to fall into. I've really got to focus again and get back into a regular workout routine again.

One of the things I've noticed today is that I still concentrate on what I want to do, not always what I "should" do. When I first started working with Yourself!Fitness, I was very good and followed the daily focus. I really think it pushed me harder in the beginning. I had been doing weights, but I had a tendancy of only doing the excercises I wanted to do, and avoiding the ones I didn't.

Well I'm back to only concentrating on what I want to work on. For some reason I really enjoy doing upper body weight lifting. I'm sure part of it is that it doesn't strain my knee, but I also feel that I get the best results from it. It's the area on my body that I've seen the most improvement. (especially in the shoulders).

I also think part of me knows that I can physically do the upper body exercises. Maya doesn't throw any thing at me that I can't do. It may be hard and sometimes I really struggle to finish a set (and some I may not be able to finish), but it's not like the core, lower or even the flexibility workouts. I still have a lot of things that I simply can't physically do. Some I know I'll never be able to do, and I find that very discouraging. Yes, I know that pushing myself at doing the really hard stuff is how I'll improve, but I find it so frustrating.

Okay, in re-evalutation: there are some upper body workouts that I can't do, specifically pushups.

So I need to focus, get into a regular routine again (and more often). As I say: Half Assed Makes for Larger Asses.

Today's Positive Comment:
I completed workout # 171 with Maya today.

Tuesday, April 19, 2005

One Day Older, A Little More Shorter Of Breath?

Well, I'm now officially 36 years old. (If 35 wasn't a milestone, I guess 36 isn't either). All in all I had a great weekend. I did skip a workout on my birthday. Oh well, I had a good workout on Saturday. I also was back on track on Monday.

We went to The Sly Fox Brewery for lunch on Saturday. I did a beer sampler. They make such nice beer. Even their Helles was excellent for a lager. However, it's their dark beers that really shine. One of the best stouts I've ever had. Their brown ale is one of my all time favs. They had a couple of seasonal beers, including an alt and a weisse that I really enjoyed as well. It was all yummy. I love different beers, but it's one of the things I've really cut back on. Basically I've had maybe 3 or 4 beers so far this year. So having a sampler of a bunch of beers was lovely.

So I've had my splurge: beer, onion rings, pulled pork sandwich and birthday cake. Today the remainder of the birthday cake was removed from the house and taken with Matt to work. Goodbye yummy birthday cake. I enjoyed you, but I'm sure you'll make others very happy too.

So Maya worked my butt off today. We decided to do a 45 minute workout with an upper body concentration. She gave me a nice little warm up and cardio (total about 15 minutes worth) followed by 30 of the hardest weight workouts she's had me do to date. 3 sets of tricep dips? she must be kidding. I simply can't do tricep dips, so I went over to my Smith machine and did tricep pulldowns. Still was really tough, but it doesn't bother my hands or wrists (like dips do).

I'm hoping that some of these "body weight" exercises will get easier as I lose more weight. I still really struggle with pushups (again, it's my hands that hurt... 154lbs is a lot of weight on them). I used to have a similar problem when I first started working out when I was much heavier. I used to try to walk, but lugging around an extra 80 lbs put a lot of weight on my size 5.5 feet. That's the main reason we got the stationary bike. It was a good way to start. I now can walk without the foot pain, so I'm hoping that eventually I'll be able to do dips and pushups.

Today's Positive Comment:
I had a very happy birthday. I look forward to spending the next year taking care of myself and be even healthier by the age of 37.

Friday, April 15, 2005

The Magic Formula

One of the things that I've learned over all these years of struggling with my weight (and with the whole weight loss process) is that most people don't really want to hear "the magic formula". Even if they ask you how you lost your weight, they really don't want to hear it was thru eating a healthy diet and exercising (a lot of exercising).

The formula is easy, implementing it, not so much. Quite frankly, the only magic formula to lose weight is to burn more calories than you consume. For me to make this work, that means food logs and lots of extra exercise. It's hard work, it's a lot of sacrifice and it takes a lot of honesty.

I think it's the honesty that most people don't want to deal with. Food logs only work if you track every single thing you eat. Whether it's the taste of pasta while preparing dinner, or just a little of what ever the kids left on their plate before you do dishes, or a piece of hard candy. It's the serving and a half compared to just one serving. Those things do add up. They add up a lot more than most people realize.

If I cheat on my food logs, the only person I cheat is myself. My weight loss may be slow, but it has been steady. I haven't stopped eating carbs or meat or really anything. I've cut down on certain foods (a moment of silence for the beloved grilled cheese sandwiches which are no longer a daily staple for me), but that doesn't mean I won't eat those foods on occassion.

My birthday is Sunday. I am going to splurge. I will have birthday cake. The food log will be put away for the day (maybe even the weekend, as I think Matt and I will go out for lunch on Saturday and I'll probably have a beer and some ribs). Will I beat myself up for this weekend of decadence. Nope, but that also means that come Monday, the food log will come back out.

I'll also add that the workouts will not be stopped. Just as I plan on brushing my teeth over the weekend (twice a day, thank you very much), I will keep to my workout regimine.

I guess my point on today's entry is that there is no magic formula, but a life style that must be adopted for sucess. Even tho' I'm still 20-30 lbs from my goal, I do feel that I've adopted, and even to some extent embraced a healthier lifestyle. Making healthy choices most of the time makes the times I do splurge more fun!

Today's Positive Comment:
At age 36 I weigh 60 lbs less than I did when I was 30.

Monday, April 11, 2005


Matt and I talk a lot about how to deal with suffering thru workouts. Everyone has different levels of what they can stand. He always talks about the professional cyclists ability to suffer. To be able to continue biking up mountains, in rain, in the cold, in the heat, in the wind after you've passed your anerobic threshold is beyond his comprehension.

I look at him and can't comprehend his ability to suffer. He bikes everyday in almost every type of weather condition (only thing that will keep him in is extreme cold or rain). I've never seen him not ride due to heat... he'll ride in tempertures above 100.

So we all have our levels at what we can suffer thru. I've learned that my tolerance has increased. I know can workout with tiny aches and pains. With menstral cramps. When I just don't feel like it. (I don't have weather as an excuses, as I actually don't really like to work out outside).

However, after watching a documentary on the Endurance, Matt and I decided we have no concept of what suffering is really about. (you can read more about Shackleton's successful failure here).

Next time I'm hungry or tired or just feel sorry for myself, I'll think about the men who survived some extreme circumstances.

Today's Positive Comment:
I'm warm and not hungry. I live in comfort.

Sunday, April 10, 2005

Perky Ponytails

It never ceases to amaze me what can really boost my motivation. Who knew that it could be as simple of where I put my ponytail when I worked out.

I know that I feel better about my workouts when I have "pretty" workout clothes. I used to work out in old crappy, stained over sized t shirts. Since I've bought some fun workout clothes, I look forward to my workouts and I feel a little extra bounce in my step.

As I mentioned in my last post, I had a perky ponytail and it really helped my workout. I usually just put it at the back of my head out of my way. Well, if I put it up higher, it's even more out of the way (especially for crunches and other floor exercises) and I looove the way it bounces when I work out. Weird. I guess the next thing I'll learn about myself is that I get a better workout if my legs are shaved (one of the reasons I don't go to the gym: too much hair removal!)

Maya worked my butt off yesterday (well, not technically, as it's still big). We did a 30 minute weight loss workout and she decided that since I vacuumed all the dog hair off the step bench, I should concentrate on it. The step bench really pushes me. In a 30 minute workout, I burned over 300 caloried. None of the other workouts have me burn that much in such a short period of time. So I think tomorrow well do the 15 minutes of a target (either legs or core) then I'm going to follow it up with a 30 minute weight loss workout. I need to set up a schedule for myself of what and when I do the workouts. I liked what Maya had me do in the beginning, but now I need (want) more calorie burning workouts. If I do a 30 minute workout on a target area, she only has me warm up and do a cardio for about 10 minutes before we hit the weights (if I move it up to 45 minutes, I get a 15 minute warm up and cardio and the hour gives me only 20 minutes before we hit the weights. I don't need 40 minutes of weight training. I like doing weight training, but I need to burn more calories as well as build muscle... ). So I'm going to do a little customization.

Today's Positive Comment:
Has nothing to do with fitness or diet. I finished one of the prettiest sweaters I've ever seen. It only took me 3 months to knit and I love the finished sweater!

Wednesday, April 06, 2005

#%$%#^ Bathing Suits

I got a new bathing suit this year. It's something I've needed, but there's nothing quite as depressing as getting a bathing suit. I don't know too many people who are comfortable in one, and we always worry about it (yet we forget that so does most everyone else).

It was a bit of a wake up call for me. I've been so happy with my weight loss that I still forget that I still have quite a bit of weight to lose. It's not that I shouldn't feel good about losing the 60 lbs, but I need to remember that I'm still at an unhealthy weight.

I'm 5'2". Even at 154 lbs, I'm about 30 lbs away from a healthy weight. So I've bumped up my workouts again, and back to measuring the food. Blah. Not fun, but it's time to shoot for a few more pounds.

I must say that this is NOT about vanity (hey, I still wore a bathing suit in public when I weighed 214 lbs). I'm always amazed how many people equate losing weight with physical appearance. I even had someone say to me "it's more important to be healthy"... why, yes, I agree... and there is absolutely no way being over 100 lbs overweight is healthy. Hell, if I was worried about my physical appearance, I would probably wear make up and get my hair cut once in a while.

So Maya and I are doing our daily workouts together again. I've bumped her up to a 30 minute workout of either the weight loss or the cardio and a 15 minute workout on something else (usually core or lower body as I still have a tendancy of doing 30 minute upper body). I'm trying to get a little extra cardio in, too. Either on the stationary bike or on the treadmill. Those little extra workouts add up. I wish I could get back into the habit of 15-20 minutes before every meal. It's a great way to get little workouts in with out really making a huge time commitement. However, breakfast is hard (I'm not a morning person... ) and I already do my main workout before I eat lunch. Dinner is my one main responsibility a day, so I'm usually worrying about what I'm making or such. Now that the time has changed and the weather is getting nicer, that may be easier to do...

Today's Positive Comment:
I have the perkiest ponytail today. Makes for a perky workout! Oh, and it's actually beautiful out (mid-70's... the windows are open and the fresh air is wonderful!!!)